July 28, 2011
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When I started on this pagan path over 10 years ago I certainly had a different outlook on Paganism and Wicca. In the small town I grew up in everyone was Christian. If there was a pagan presence in that small town it was well hidden. So much so that I gather it probably didn’t want to be found. This compounded with the mentality that seemingly strikes all small town folk that your town is an island. It is the idea that since everything you need is all located with 15 square miles that traveling any distance outside of that is rare and is a hassle. I didn’t know when I first started studying Wicca that there was an established community maybe only 30 minutes away that had worked hard for Pagan rights and awareness. The internet was still young, hand written notes were common, and stopping by a strangers house to use the phone was perfectly ok. Cell phones, email, and broadband internet were definitely around but life moves slower in small towns. People had free time in the evenings to sit and listen to the Earth move. Finding a book about the craft was special. I still could never find one in my town, but had to go to the neighboring town that had a mall to find such things. It was still only a 15 minute car ride. I remember how I felt the first time I read about Initiation in a book. It talked about coven initiation primarily but that really wasn’t an option for me. I had been studying paganism for just over a year and hadn’t met any other pagans. Just like my town, I had become an Island. My only contact with other pagans were angelfire websites that would load on the family’s dial up connection. A coven was far to foreign for initiation but still once I decided that I was pagan I knew I wanted to initiate. I also knew that at that moment I wasn’t quite ready. The want was there but I felt like I hadn’t earn it yet. I needed to live as a pagan and learn more before I gave myself over fully to this path. I started a Book of Shadows, studied correspondence, read about the religion, and slowly came to a point were I had affirmed this faith I had enough to present it to my newly found Gods and Goddesses.
I looked up into the night. My senses on fire and my energy through the roof. I didn’t know what to call them so I referred to Deity as my Lord and Lady. I proclaimed, “Lord and Lady, my name is Keegan. I come to you in humble service. So Mote it Be.” I’m sure there was more but that was all improved and ramblings of a star struck teenager. I remember the warm breeze that night. I remember crying, and finally feeling free. I felt accepted, not by myself or friends and family, but rather acknowledged by the Gods that I was heard and that they were going to hold be to that vow… a vow of service. If anything I felt humbled, and when I took that first step away from my make shift circle and came back into this world and this life I knew things would never be the same. I was no longer an island.
Now I start another beginning and I find myself again at Initiation. Tomorrow I will be initiated into Rose Hollow Coven and will have earned my First Degree. It is as it should be, an acknowledgement of service to my Lord and Lady. There is benefit though to being a part of a coven. I have a wiser HP and HPS to help me walk through it this time and I can offer the coven my service. With their help I hope to become a better pagan and well rounded High Priest. I also hope that I am able to teach them a few things. Knowing the kind of people they are I know they appreciate all of their coveners and are constantly growing as people and pagans themselves. I feel ready at this point to be apart of that relationship. I know I have much room for growth, but also know that will come with further diligent study and time.
January 27, 2010
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So it starts. My mind is heightened and my will razor sharp. If my intent were a shotgun it would be fully loaded, chambers full of deadly might. I find myself perched staring down that gun with a target in sight. Every moment wanting to pull the trigger but waiting because I know that perfect shot is coming.
Chris Geddie, an awesome human being, said to me once.
Pain from regret last forever, but Pain from effort is only temporary.
I wish I could shake his hand today to tell him that his words resonate inside of me and drive my path as a Man, Wiccan, Husband, Business Owner, and Friend.
As is the Season, a series of events were set forth a couple of weeks ago when I met with the kind leaders of a local Coven. After what seems like weeks of waiting I am able to carry on with that initial planting to help this little seedling grow. This weekend is going to have more pagany events in it for me then I have had in many years combined. It is my sincere hope that I am able to be genuine with the people I meet this weekend and that my heart and mind open so wide as to redefine what it means to me to be a Pagan. Maybe that is setting the standard a little high, but as a solitary wiccan it is what I have craved most in my religious goals. That goal better defined is to meet other pagans to worship, learn from, and live. I am attending an Imbolc celebration on Sat. by Rose Hollow. Then on Sunday the High Priestess has invited my wife and I out to visit some of the local pagan shops and to a public ritual being held by another local coven. I feel on fire with excitement. I feel doubly blessed that I get to share this experience with my amazing wife.
There is always a catch to walking the road less traveled. Sure it may be exciting but there is a lot of unknown. The obstacles I face currently is a relatively easy one, but I need help. Everyone attending Imbolc was asked to bring something to represent a goal for the upcoming planting season. The example was given that if you were going to exercise more to bring running shoes. I am totally stuck as to what to bring. My first impression was something to do with my business. I started it only last year and would like to see it grow but I really don’t want to seem pretentious or give the first impression that money is that important to me. Right now there is a lot going on for me. I have my music with new instruments to learn. There is my new relationship with this coven that I hope will grow. Also, I have a new tarot deck that I would love to really get to know more personally. Additionally I have this blog which I really want to keep expanding with more music and adding into the Book of Shadows.
What about you? Share with me if you would what you would bring to such an event or even what you are focusing on this Imbolc.
I think the examples might help me brain storm. Comment below or email me firstname.lastname@example.org
January 18, 2010
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Friday turned out to be just a crazy good day. My business made a good deal of money, I got a lot of work done, and after work went to a meeting with the HPS and HP of a coven named Rose Hollow. Amber and Eric were such a nice surprise. I really did go into this meeting with no expectations and was just glad to meet a fellow pagan.
My wife and I are currently looking for a Wicca 101 class. We are at the point in our lives where we are craving some religious structure and find it hard to find that on our own. We also are looking for pagan friends. Our experience with having non-pagan friends has not turned out good so far, but that is a whole other post.
So, in the rain and through busy Dallas rush hour traffic we drove to a Starbucks and made a connection. It is weird but afterwards I discovered that I might just have a prejudice against pagans. I know this because I was so relieved that that Amber and Eric were normal and truly down to earth people. I don’t know exactly what I was so surprised by but I remember thinking afterwards just how cool and honest they seemed. It was also refreshing to hear that a Pagan group is active in the community. Rose Hollow appearently does a good deal of charity for the area. The HPS even told this story how they donated to a local church that they knew needed help with their coat and blanket drive recently. In my head I am saying to myself, “Woah, that takes a real want to help someone,” but in actuality I just tried to play it cool. I didn’t want to seem overly eager to be apart of this coven. I have to keep reminding myself to hold back and be objective, but I know that these guys are a good fit because of something I learned from the real estate business. If during the visit to a property the potential buyers are already making plans and envisioning themselves in the property then they have already made a decision. In my head I could already see myself banging a drum at ritual and think about what I was going to wear.
The initial meeting turned out well and we were invited to their Imbolc ritual here in February. We are excited to get to know the rest of the coven. I know even though I could get along with the HP and HPS that it is important that I get to know the rest of the Coven before making any definite decisions. So far, so good.
January 9, 2010
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So I had a rare opportunity to help someone recently. They had contacted me through the blog here to give them a Tarot reading. This was really such a positive experience. It is just nice to connect with someone and be able to provide some guidance. I would love to do more. The process I don’t think is very unique. The person sent me their name, birth date, and a question. I then do a little research on the birth date and sign and then take that information along with the question and meditate for a bit over everything. I do this while shuffling the cards and then when they tell me that it is time I stop shuffling and deal the spread. A bit take raising power for spell work by the time the cards are dealt I feel overwhelmed with emotion like my aura is on fire. Check it out here.
So I have totally jumped on board with Pagan podcasts. By far my favorite would be The Wigglian Way with Mojo and Sparrow. Here is there website. Also you can follow the link in the sidebar. I’ll list my other favorites as I run across really good one, although it will be hard to follow up those Wigglians. To check out some other great pod kin check out The Pagan Podcast Index here, or check them out in the sidebar.
Hope to get in another post before the weekend is out. It should be pretty low-key so I’ll have some down time. It will be good rest after a crazy busy week. Next week my business is taking on 3 or 4 new clients so I will be busy pushing paperwork and making trips to the bank. Towards the end of the week I am meeting with the High Priestess on a local Coven called Rose Hollow. My wife and I have recently been searching out a coven to finds some like friends and add a new dimension to our faith. I think my next post should be about how I came to the craft. Until then, Blessed Be.